Traveling To Heal What Was Lost

All of the sudden, I can’t stop thinking about traveling again. For so very long it has been the furthest thing from my mind. But by the end of last week, the weekend, and now into the beginning of this week, I can’t stop imagining where’d we go first. I expected to feel this when I got my second vaccine dose. But instead, it took weeks. And in reality, I’m not sure it has anything to do with the vaccine specifically. Sure, knowing I could go somewhere is made easier by two scribbled lines that provide proof of two full jabs and a month of a cushion. There’s still a strange thrill when I realize I can wear my mask and not be afraid of public transportation. Just this weekend, the kids and I rode the bus together for the first time in over a year! 

It sure is lovely to dream of a visit that helps sustain my relationship, without the looming fear of covid in me or in him (despite our negative tests). But I think the desire to travel lately is a bit deeper than that. I want to travel to reconnect to myself. I want to travel to feel what my body feels like in the air. I want to see the ground between the clouds. I want to have long evening conversations with my children about what they’ve learned and experienced. 

I know that traveling is inherently a gift. It is one that I didn’t take for granted before and won’t in the near future. I love this city so much, but what is this place that calls me that I can not name? It surely isn’t Miami or Los Angeles (two places I am uninterested in). Maybe it’s Berlin when it opens again? Or France? In my dreams though, I see the colors of Lisbon and food devoured on street corners. 

In the New York Times, clinical psychologist and senior director of Health Care Innovation at the American Psychological Association shared this about traveling, “It provides a much-needed break from the routines we’ve had to establish to survive the stress of the pandemic, and reminds us of all the vast beauty and humanity that exists outside the homes we’ve been isolating in since last March.”

My children are most excited to see their grandparents again, too. But that’s just a few hours drive away. When they ask me where would we go first, I say, “Wherever we can just be.” 

How about you?

6 thoughts on “Traveling To Heal What Was Lost

  • Reply Saida April 20, 2021 at 5:01 pm

    “Wherever we can just be.” I leave for home (the Virgin Islands) on Friday, two weeks exactly after my second vaccine dose. I’d gotten to the point where I needed to experience that feeling. Every time the plane lands after I’ve spent time away, I exhale. My body relaxes in a way that it physically can’t anywhere else. I bought the ticket on a whim and the timing, the way I need to exhale, I can’t even begin to describe it. And I know that that moment of exhalation too, is a privilege. I know that what comes after is going to require that I call on that rested version of myself. It’s not lost on me. We all deserve rest. It isn’t earned. And still, I’m so grateful.

    • Reply latonya April 20, 2021 at 8:06 pm

      Saida,

      Thank you for this beautiful note that filled me with such joy and hope tonight. I’m so happy you get to have that much needed exhale. And you’re so right, we are all deserving of rest. And in a year where so many of us felt on guard and like we couldn’t “rest” and let our guard down, it is even more important we lean into that desire to finally exhale. Sending you so much love

  • Reply Blythe April 21, 2021 at 10:54 am

    I was postpartum with a 6-month-old when lockdown began here in the Midwest. There’s so many things we haven’t done – dining out! the zoo! children’s museum! playdates! – that we’re just now beginning to explore, albeit it is MUCH more complicated with a toddler. I booked us a place on Lake Michigan that we’ll drive to this Summer. Being near the water is my happiest of places and I’m excited to share that beauty, love, and awe with my son.

    • Reply latonya April 21, 2021 at 1:05 pm

      Blythe,

      Thank you so much for sharing. I love that you all will head to Lake Michigan and that you get some ease (with a toddler) soon.

  • Reply Maywyn April 21, 2021 at 12:27 pm

    To just be…Canada, whenever the border opens.
    Only a few hours away. I sense visiting Old Montreal will be fascinating. I’ve heard it has an old world vibe.
    Glad I rediscovered your blog! I visited here years ago, and today on my old laptop, I found the blog bookmark.

    • Reply latonya April 21, 2021 at 1:07 pm

      Hi Maywyn, Thanks for coming back! Happy to have you. I heard the same thing about Old Montreal!

      Love that you’re doing that (whenever you can)

      L

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