Our house is currently in a phase of never apart, though we surely do need it. I’ve attempted every trick in the book to convice O, and to ease him into being separated from his sister and I for a bit while we spend solo time. While there has been a few successful moments, none of which I’d dare to write about. The bandaid rip approach is anything but, and equating and bribing him with time alone or a gift even, won’t suffice. It is a sign of the times, and I’m working the patience wheel for it.
On most occasions, R is okay with this. I think, if I’m being honest, the struggle with them is that I think they need time separately with me (and without). Nevertheless, I imagine and plan days with my almost double digit daughter quite often.
If we were alone, here’s what we’d do:
A game of double dutch, in which we’d still use an old phone chord. It would be tied to an iron fence, or with my sister as lead turner. We’d teach her how to make the concrete heat, and take breaks in the shade. She’d learn the rhymes I knew well at her age, and we’d get dizzy with twisted words and pounding breaths.
A game of Sleeping Queens, where she’d beat me, because she’s just good at almost everything. We’d lay our bodies on the cool wood floor in the early evening as our shared favorite tunes crooned through the speaker. When done, we’d walk for ice cream, and both then realize we rather sorbet, because duh. The cards would stay and we wouldn’t worry about losing one or all, because she’s a Capricorn and I’m a Cancer, and tbh it’s nearly impossible. haha
A round of 90s hand games because they really are so fun and nostalgic, and a good dose any day of the week is necassary medicine.
If you had the chance to play a game solo with your 9 year-old self, daughter, family or friend, what would it be?
P.S Magic of Black Girls’ Play
(Photograph East Harlem in 1998. Bruce Davidson/Magnum Photos. Heads up: This post has affiliate links. If you choose to purchase something, I may earn a small commission.)
I read this aloud to my 8 year old middle daughter while we stole a few minutes away from her sisters. She loved your ideas, of course, and said your writing sounds like a list poem she’d like to share on Poetry Day at school. Last time we had time to ourselves, we played marble checkers and I taught her sudoku. Thank you for your ideas!
this is the sweetest, EM! I am so happy you read it to her, and would be honored if she ever read the list! I love that. you all got to spend time, and even reading something to her… that’s such a wonderful way. I’ll have to do that tomorrow as well.
x
LOVED reading this and bookmarked all of these things you mentioned. I love this age with my girl too, she’s 9 and we play lots of ball catching games in our backyard, also board games – a few of our favorites are Chess, Sequence, Trivial Persuit also Monopoly Deal & What do you Meme recently! Also we have an old Xbox Kinect so a 20 minute workout challenge is so fun too.