One of my favorite things about being a mother these days is how much I learn on a daily basis. Each time I tell someone I have a 7 year old, they usually respond with, “So you’ve been at this for a while already!” And while that may be true, I feel like so much is new. I’ am always learning…
This past year I’ve learned a lot about transitions, and how to guide my children through them with love and stability, however small or large they may be. Some nights, I would sit in bed and couldn’t believe I was in charge of making sure two little people felt truly heard and cared for. I would find myself talking myself up, “You’re the adult, LaTonya. You’re the mom.” Or, I’d text a friend who has older children and would ask for a word or two of encouragement.
My therapist, my friends and I agreed, it’s always good to openly talk with your kids. Kids need (and deserve) language around their feelings and circumstances.
If you’re interested, my conversation rules are:
1. Make it simple, but smart.
2. Don’t cry, but don’t be afraid to show emotions.
3. There’s always room for questions and more questions.
4. Re-adress and re-affirm as often as they’d like.
4. You’re the parent. Don’t forget that.
It seems, once we take away the idea that kids aren’t capable of conversations, we kind of give them more agency over their feelings and their place in a transition. Any tips of your own?