I hope you had a wonderful long weekend. Motherhood right now looks a lot like stepping back in disbelief. This winter, River turned six. Oak is just a few weeks shy of three. How is this possible? Well, yes, I know the how. But when? With his third birthday quickly approaching, there is a lot of talk about a third baby. River has been requesting one non-stop. A baby girl, to be specific. She even convinced me that I wouldn’t have to do a single thing. The baby topic has led to amazing (and sometimes difficult) discussions about a women’s body. It is becoming more and more clear that we may not have a third baby. And though this is what I wanted, it’s weird to have all these other stamps of finality on the subject. The growing age gap of Oak and a potential child, the ease of life now that we are not caring for a newborn.
I’ve been lucky enough to fall into a group of girlfriends who had their children later in life; swapping my diaper changes with careers. They’re all mostly convinced that I have all the time in the world, and may just up and have another a few years from now. Peter and I see this whole other life waiting for us when our kids are older. When we are older, but not too old. “We’ll be young enough,” we say. I’m not sure if it seems selfish, smart, or both, to push off this urge to add to our family. All I know is that right now, I feel exceptionally capable, my children are healthy, and motherhood right now is wonderful.
Anyone else navigating this particular phase?
(Images by Heather Moore from my interview and feature on Mothermag)
Hi Latonya,
I am facing the same thoughts right now. We fought infertility twice and now have 2 amazing girls. My daughter Zoë is 4 and Skye is turning just 7 weeks this Thursday. It has dawned on me that this is it. We were so lucky to have 2 even though I was told years ago by a specialist to start thinking of other options, that having a baby of my own may never happen. Well now I see how it's actually possible and this has me thinking if I want a third. I am loving motherhood and all it's ups and downs. I don't want to miss the chance. My friends are working women and I used to be, now I'm raising our girls, writing a blog (Girl Nesting) and occasionally modeling. Do I go for it when my body is ready again? I just can't decide.
I love your blog, I've followed it since Zoë was a baby.
xoxo!
Jahaila @ Girl Nesting
That second photo of River is stunning. So much depth in her eyes. Was the gap between River and Oak very manageable. I'm about to have my first and already thinking of my second (perhaps out of ignorance for what's to come LOL)
Thank you so much for commenting, Jahaila. The back and forth always reminds me of my friends who decided or (don't) to have children. When you're certain, the first seems easy, but the second and third seems like a toss up. Really love reading your perspective.
Yes, it was amazing! Really, truly. I suggest it all the time. River was 3+ so she understood a lot! She was able to, and wanted to help a lot. Many of my friends go through the transition pretty tough, but the age gap and River's general personality helped so much!
I enjoyed reading the full interview. Good read, candid and engaging. Beautiful family.
Thank you so much for reading it, and for your sweet words.
xo
I'm in this same space. My little girl just turned 7 and I've gone back and forth with baby fever and having a third. I was the first of my friends to have kids and we are in a really great space but the kids are crying out for another. I want to work on birthing another business but I also yearn to birth another child.