potty training

So, it’s a secret to this blog, but not so much to my friends, that I have been potty training River. And well, it isn’t really a secret as much as it’s a “I don’t want to even put this into the atmosphere or she might regress” fear. But, I finally feel comfortable enough to talk about it (yes, potty training is that big of a deal).

River is about 80% potty trained. I just put a percentage on it; kind of hilarious.

Right after I lost the baby, I thought it would be a great healing experience to put all of my heart into a project or two. I chose decorating our new apartment and potty training. Up until then it seemed as if River and I were never on equal footing when it came to the subject. Sometimes she would want to go for it, and I was just too busy to commit to staying home to train her. Then, sometimes I had the time, and she truly despised it. It never seemed… right.  One night she woke up and explained that she had to go potty. After a few minutes of potty play she went. We both were ecstatic and I knew that it was time to just go for it.

We started off a few days straight in the house diaper-less. That went well, however, cleaning up accidents was just torture to my eyes and to my clean floors. 😉 When she advanced a little we went to Target and she picked out her own “big girl” underwear. Now we are taking on the daunting task of heading outside without a pull-up!

All of this potty stuff has been a hard pill to swallow. But I think going outside sans a pull-up will be the hardest.

First, we are outside a lot, and what New York City doesn’t have is a ton of convenient restrooms. Secondly, I like to pack light. Meaning, when we are out, we grab a few snacks, some wipes, a toy and we are gone. Bringing a second set of clothing out for her reminds me of infancy… oversized diaper bag-my nightmare. Lastly, she isn’t communicating well enough for my comfort level. When River has to potty when she is out she usually doesn’t say much. She’ll just look at me with the saddest eyes, and a face full of frustration. I want her to use her words more in that way, during that moment, but since she knows that I can read her pretty well she chooses not to. I am almost certain if she was with someone else she would articulate her needs more soundly.

I am so proud of how far she has come. Every time she goes potty on the toilet at home we do a little potty dance that consists of the twist, jumping, and a few kicks. With a treat and a high five as a reward I can see how proud of herself she is.

Tomorrow we are off on a play-date at a new park. That means I have no idea where the closest bathroom is, or if it’s even in commision (New York also has a lot of broken toilets, ugh). So, unfortunately she will need a pull-up in the morning. I’m sure like most things, this outside without a pull-up thing will come so much easier. But for now she’ll just go without a pull-up in our neighborhood.

At least till mama builds up the courage.

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